Worrying can make you physically anxious for example, increase in heart rate, butterflies and feeling tense. When people experience the physical symptoms of anxiety, this usually leads to more worrying about the symptoms, creating a vicious cycle.
There are lots of practical steps you can take to combat your worrying and to break the vicious cycle. These are techniques that I share with my clients at my NLP and Hypnotherapy practice in Hertfordshire.
Identify and clarify the worrying thought: Often worrying thoughts are experienced as several fleeting ideas and images that race through your mind. Spending the time writing down exactly what it is that is worrying you brings the thought out into the open. This in itself can show the worrying thought up as being less scary then when it was just in your head. Sometimes these thoughts are so automatic and quick that I will spend time at my NLP and Hypnotherapy practice, Hertfordshire helping clients identify worrying thoughts.
Explore what the worse thing that could happen would be if the thought was true: Often you will find that it is much easier to cope with a clearly defined worst outcome, then the product of your imagination, which is usually fantasy based and much worse!
Look at the thought logically: This involves examining the objective evidence of whether the thought is true. Create two columns on a piece of paper and on one list evidence to support the thought and under the other list evidence that disputes the thought. This is a process that is used at Hypnotherapy, Hertfordshire. The therapist works with the client to elicit the evidence, using a series of questions designed to help the person broaden their view of the situation.
Another point of view: Try looking at the worry from another perspective. For example, what would you advise a loved one who was concerned over the same thought. Also think about other times in your life when you would feel different about the worry.
What are the benefits or losses of holding onto this thought: Look at whether holding onto your worrying thought helps or hinders you.
Over-generalising: Are you viewing the situation/self in all or nothing terms e.g. complete disaster------- totally perfect ? Actually rate your thought out of 100% to remind yourself that your worry is probably somewhere other then complete disaster on a sliding scale.
Take Action: Rather then passively worrying which does not benefit you, look at whether there is anything you can do about the situation. Make a list of action steps that you can take.
Free time: If you are always worrying then become stricter with yourself and how you spend your time. Dedicate a set time to worrying, ensuring that within your time you set goals for action or work on your worry by going through all the steps to combat worrying already discussed. Then set dedicated time each day for relaxing - time where you will practice distracting your thoughts from worrying. Becoming proficient at a good body relaxation technique can be really useful.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Ways To Combat Worrying
How To Be The Best That You Can Be
by: Pamela Glynn
Have you ever wondered why it is that some people seem to succeed at everything they decide to do, while others struggle through life never quite finding the success and fulfillment that in a sense is everyone’s right?
You might have done more than wonder. It might even be that you’ve felt envious of others’ successes … and begrudged them their fame, riches, big house, fast car or whatever. I must admit to having done my share of that when I was struggling and convincing myself that some had all the luck, while others had none.
But then I began to wonder whether they actually had endless luck … or something else. And I began to read up on the subject – autobiographies of successful people such as Richard Branson and Robert T. Kiyosaki – and books on how to achieve.
I learned something very interesting: the way we look at things makes all the difference between achievement and non-achievement. If we see something as impossible it quickly becomes impossible, whereas if we start looking hard for possibilities these start presenting themselves. It’s a question of ‘I can if I think I can’, which might seem simplistic – but then life is often simpler than we think!
Everything begins with a thought. Alexander Graham Bell could not have invented the telephone without first thinking that such a device must be within the bounds of possibility. Likewise Sir Alexander Fleming, discoverer of penicillin, and that other famous Fleming – Ian, creator of 007 James Bond. Imagine how much poorer we’d all be without ‘phones, antibiotics and the super-spy whose antics both on the written page and our cinema and TV screens have held millions enthralled!
And start imagining how you could improve your situation by thinking different thoughts. Instead of thinking ‘I wish I had his/her money, lifestyle, private plane, island etc’ start thinking of all that you do have and counting your blessings. As you count them, perhaps – if appropriate - starting with your health, you’ll begin to see that things could be a lot worse than they are and you can move on from there to develop an attitude of plenty rather than of lack.
I used to be forever focusing on what I couldn’t afford, rather than on what I could. One of my favorite expressions was ‘I can’t justify the cost of that’. Bit by bit I took myself in hand, developing a different attitude and beginning to understand that I was creating my own destiny. When I made a negative choice it was almost inevitable that there was a negative outcome, whereas when I erred on the side of the positive (thinking ‘I can’ instead of ‘I can’t’) the outcomes of my decisions started improving.
As these improved, so did my attitude – unless it all began with my attitude? Once I stopped focusing on lack and started permitting the flow of good things I found after a while that I lacked nothing.
I also found more to like about myself than I had found when I let envy color my perceptions. And the more I liked, the more I believed that absolutely anything is possible – which indeed it is, if you set out to be the best that you can be!
© Pamela Glynn
Where's Your Success
by: Alison Bolger
Don’t you just get fed up hearing about all these successful people and how well they are doing? You don’t begrudge others their success, as you know they deserve to be successful, and have probably worked really hard to get what they have. But you know you have been trying really hard to be successful too, and no matter how hard you try nothing seems to work. It’s just not fair is it? So what’s the difference? There must be something that they’re doing that you aren’t but what is it?
Maybe there are some underlying beliefs you have, that you are not even aware of that are stopping you from getting what you want. At some core level you are sabotaging yourself without even being conscious of what you are doing. Hard to believe isn’t it?
You were born to be successful, but from a very early age you start learning how to be unsuccessful. As a kid you believed you could do and be anything you wanted with no limitations. In the games you played you actually believed you were superman or bat woman with no limitations on what you could do. When you sung into your pretend microphone you just knew you were going to be the next big rock star. You were happy, carefree and afraid of nothing.
Then as you grew up you started listening to the adults around you, and as they are bigger than you, you started believing everything they said. I’m sure you have heard them before…”you can’t have everything in life”, “money doesn’t grow on trees”, “that’s just not practical” etc. etc. You started to believe what they said and all of a sudden your light is turned off and you stop wanting altogether. You start living life from a practical, logical perspective. “If I want to get anywhere in life I’ll have to work hard”. “It doesn’t matter what job I have as long as I can earn enough money to pay the bills”. Before you know it you have taken on layer after layer of all these beliefs and your whole life revolves around living your life within the boundaries of those beliefs.
Once you realize that this is what you’re doing, then you can start paying attention to what you’re thinking about on a daily basis. Just by recognizing what you’re thinking about will help you free up some of your attention around your old beliefs. You can begin to replace those old beliefs with some new ones that will start bringing you the things you want.
Once you recognize that a thought or belief is not serving you then you need to replace it with something that will move you in the direction of your dreams. Your ability to change the thoughts and ideas you have of yourself will determine your success.
In Sandy Forster’s book “How to be wildly Wealthy Fast” you will learn quick and easy success secrets that will help you achieve your dreams. And by following the simple strategies you’ll soon be on your way to creating the success you desire and deserve.