by: Linda Ding
Do you know that the environment you live in will have an important and
significant effect on the result of your endeavour? Few people can
describe the relationship between environment and success since they
consider that they don't have direct relationship with each other.
However, what I want to tell you is that environment do have fairly
crucial effect on success. And that is what I want to discuss with you
in this article.
Have you ever heard about a proverb says in China that he that lies down with dogs must rise up with flea?
When it comes to success, environment may not play a decisive role in
it, nevertheless, it must be the most crucial element for success.
People will be unconsciously influenced by the environment they live in
and as a result, the performance of them will be largely influenced by
environment as well.
If you don't believe it, I would like to give you several instances to support my opinion.
A friend of mine grew up in a family which was filled with warm and
love, as a consequence, she became a fairly moderate, kind and
enthusiastic person now. Another friend of mine grew up in a family
which was filled with violence and quarrel. As a result, he became
rather pessimistic and sensitive in temper, he is easy to become angry
without consciousness.
You see, the power of environment is rather huge, it can even destroy an
individual's self-control. I mean, if your self-control is much weaker
than the power of environment around you, you will be easy to be
effected by the surroundings. That is to say, you will be controlled by
the environment.
Therefore, if you want to get wealth and success, you should be more
cautious when you choose friends. People who have optimistic state of
minds and have specific goals to fight for can be your first selection.
In addition, people who are kind, nice, enthusiastic and have a strong
ability of performance can be your alternation as well. Besides, those
who have creative minds and will be glad to help others could be your
friends too.
In addition to choose friends, the environment you live in is
significant, too. When you want to alter a job, try your best to choose a
company which has nice atmosphere, I mean, the enterprise you will work
in should have favourable spirit of teamwork and be honest and be just
enough so that you can give your full play to your work.
Pay special attention to the power of environment, then. Since it really
can affect your future to a large extent. Trust me and be cautious. You
will succeed finally.
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November
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- Environment - An Important Element Which Will Effe...
- Correct Choice Is The Key Of Success
- Grounding - The Simplest And Most Powerful Groundi...
- Famous Bruce Lee Quotes To Motivate You To Succeed
- Take The Time To CARE
- Are You Afraid Of Accepting More Good?
- Network With Ease
- Six Ways to Make Memorizing Poetry Easier
- Positive Networking
- Bobproctorsuccess: Exercise Your Mind With The Suc...
- "If I'm Perfect, No One Will Reject Me" - Healing ...
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- Seven Key Motives for Learning Spiritual Counseling
- Porn Addiction Help
- Knowing Who You Are
- Invent And Innovate Yourself
- Innovate A Current Niche To Improve Your Business
- Got Time To Read More Books?
- Why It Is Better To Simplify
- The Eyes Have It
- Stress Relief Activities Can Improve Your Life
- You Lead,I Follow - The Non-Leader
- Can You Get Codependency Treatment?
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Thursday, November 15, 2012
Environment - An Important Element Which Will Effect Success And What You Should Do
by:
Correct Choice Is The Key Of Success
by: Linda Ding
There are only two matters which you can not select during your
lifetime. One is your parents and your children, the other is survival
or death.
What we have now, which contain love, career, right, wealth, poverty,
hunger, etc, are all originated from the original selections we made. As
a result, choice is the most important part in a person's life. You
will have the corresponding results in terms of what choices you will
make.
When you have to confront making some choices, do keep in mind to think
them over seriously, carefully and cautiously. Otherwise, you may get
opposite answers.
A lot of people are confused about a question. They do things fairly
seriously and enthusiastically, why can't they get a nice outcome?They
never consider if their selections are right in the first place.
In fact, choice is more significant than endeavour if you want to
succeed. However, choice is something fairly terrible and difficult as
well. We will have a feeling of hesitation, frustration, tension, and so
on when we have to make some big decisions. You should be brave enough
to conquer those negative minds and grasp the opportunities in time.
Since you won't get another chance like that if you miss it.
There are a majority of people who do things only follow the general
trend and don't have their own creative opinions. The outcome of this is
that they can't make any achievement through their life.
A scientist named John in France once made an experiment called
"experiment of caterpillar". He put some caterpillars on the side of a
planet and made them stand in a round. Then, he put some food six meters
away from the flowerpot. To his surprise, all of those caterpillars
just walked round and round toward the side of the flowerpot day and
night without rest. But none of them chose to walked toward the outside
of the queue so that it could eat the food.
From this small story, I want to tell you that some of you are just like
those caterpillars. You are busy with something day and night. And when
others ask you what are you engaged in, you just say that you don't
know what you are occupied with.
Choices really matter when you want to succeed.As a result,if you are
eager to achieve your goals and gain wealth and success, just stay away
from stereotype and be creative and imaginative enough. Do something
different and newfangled.Taking some adventures may assist you discover
some unexpected harvests.
Grounding - The Simplest And Most Powerful Grounding Exercise
by: Bella Romero
In this article I will reveal a simple yet powerful grounding exercise.
But why would you need a grounding exercise? Because it will help you
get connected with your center. Your center is that thing you need in
difficult times. Your center will be there to help you overcome any
problem that arises. You must not lose your center. Instead, you must
stay connected with it at all times. The grounding exercise I am
revealing here will create a deep connection with your inner self and
your center. Let's begin..
If you don't succeed in performing the exercise well then don't be
disappointed. These things take time. Keep trying and give time to
yourself.
You will also need a notebook to take notes. This will help you perform
the grounding exercise better and clearly understand the process.
Finally, you will need consistency. You must repeat the exercise for at
least 10 minutes a day. If you meet these simple yet important
requirements then you are ready to perform the exercise. Here it is..
Go to your private space and sit in a comfortable position (you can try
the common cross-legged posture) and put some soft music on.
Now you will need all your visualization skills. First you must see
yourself in the center of a flower. The flower is colorful, lovely and
open. It's petals lay around you. Now see the petals rise one by one.
Imagine pure light coming from an outside source and filling the space,
you, the petals, the whole flower. Now see yourself being one with the
flower (you are the bud) and sinking into the blossom. The flower is now
closed. Feel the peace around you. Think what you have just created and
feel happy and one with your center. Try to feel your heart beating.
Determine the beating pace. Stay there for a while, these moments are
precious. This is the first and most important part of the exercise!
Very simple but powerful..
One issue that will likely arise is the presence of random thoughts that
will try to distract you. Don't get discouraged and keep clearing your
mind until you think nothing but your center or the images of the flower
and you becoming one with it.
When you are ready see the blossom unfold slowly. All its petals are
opening one by one until you find yourself in the center of the blossom
again..
Before you finish, remember to take some notes of your thoughts and
feelings that you believe are worth mentioning. At times it would be
useful to look at your notebook to recall the feelings of the past and
observe your progress.
The exercise presented will work even for amateurs but the more you
perform it, the better the results and the level of understanding of
what is going on around you.
Monday, November 12, 2012
Famous Bruce Lee Quotes To Motivate You To Succeed
by: Michael Lee
In fact, many speakers (especially his diehard fans) have a habit of quoting this famous martial artist time and again. Be inspired by these famous motivational quotes from a legend!
Bruce Lee Quote # 1: “Notice that stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind.”
If you want to succeed in life, you need to be more like the bamboo or the willow. Be open-minded and embrace change. By refusing to be flexible, you are most definitely shunning away any room for growth.
Say your company has been taken over by a new management with new policies. Are you really going to raise hell over the change just because you refuse to adapt; or do you want to keep your job? Don’t let your stubbornness get in the way.
Bruce Lee Quote # 2: “Simplicity is the key to brilliance.”
This particular statement has been proven true time and time again. Even Leonardo da Vinci said that “the simplest explanation is most likely the correct one.”
Sometimes, we over think our problems and as a result, fail to see that the solution is right in front of us. Don’t fall into the same trap that a lot of people do. Get your head out of the gutter and adopt a simple perspective.
Bruce Lee Quote # 3: “As you think, so shall you become.”
There is something very serene and meditative about this famous inspirational quote, isn’t there? Whenever I feel disappointed with myself, I repeat this mantra quietly over and over again while focusing on what I want to be like.
I close my eyes and imagine myself to be successful and confident at work. In just five minutes, I feel loads better already. This is the power of positive thinking. It’s as if Bruce Lee himself spoke to me and gave me that piece of advice!
These famous Bruce Lee quotes are quite motivating, aren’t they? They have definitely helped me get through a lot of obstacles in my life. Whether at home or at work, these quotes have definitely changed the way I see things. I hope they do the same for you. Read More »»
Take The Time To CARE
by: Julie Donley
When I started my career in health care nearly 20 years ago, I was
struck by the compassion and care with which nurses and other
professionals gave of themselves to their patients. It felt like home to
me as I embarked upon my career as a caring professional.
But I also noticed how unhappy and stressed people were. I noticed that
people who CARE often do not show that same level of compassion to
themselves or to coworkers. In nursing, especially, there was an “eat
their young” mentality.
Although today that mentality is changing, it is still a problem. Abuse
and lateral violence continues. There is too much fear and not enough
compassion, empathy, or love and respect for self and others. We CARE,
but that care is not focused on ourselves.
Healthcare is not the only place where lateral violence exists. From
corporate America to the small family business, there are mean, nasty
behaviors that take place on a regular basis meant to humiliate and beat
people down. These behaviors can often also be experienced at home.
It’s time to change that.
It’s time for us to “Take the Time to C.A.R.E. ©” about ourselves and
each other – to change how we operate. “Take the Time” simply means that
we need to take a step back and stop reacting the way we have done in
the past. At that moment when you realize there is a choice as to how to
approach a situation or person, you stop and take the time to consider
new options – to CARE – using the “C.A.R.E.” model below.
This model reflects our extraordinary capacity for compassion while
integrating our need as human beings to be treated with respect and
loving-kindness. Using this model every day, we can develop healthy work
environments – and home environments – that nurture the best in
ourselves and each other. Take a moment to consider the acronym C.A.R.E.
in order to improve your relationships – with others and with yourself.
Communicate Clearly. Be direct in your communications. Use the acronym V.E.R.B.:
Vision – express clearly your vision for the department, the shift, your family, your romantic relationship, etc.
Expectations – people need clear expectations for behavior and for the
delivery of their work. Without expectations, people do whatever they
think they should, which may or may not be acceptable.
Requests – make direct requests for what you need. Teach people to treat you the way you want to be treated.
Boundaries – express boundaries by telling people clearly what is
unacceptable to you. Teach people to stop doing things that feel bad.
Don’t assume that people know how to treat you. They don’t. And they
communicate this to you by their behavior. People want to be great –
they just don’t know how. By communicating clearly and directly, you
teach them.
Appreciate Self and Others. Compliment and praise people freely and
sincerely. Look for the good in others and tell them at every
opportunity how wonderful they are and how much they mean to you. By
looking for the good, you are less likely to judge and put down others.
People want to please, so when you offer sincere praise, they will want
to repeat the behavior. People are generally not accustomed to hearing
positive feedback so make sure your message is heard.
Respect Differences. Each of us comes from different backgrounds, has
different education and brings different perspectives. Be open to
exploring possibilities. When you insist on being right or on having
things be your way, you are not giving others the opportunity to have
their own viewpoints. You essentially take away the individual’s right
to be themselves. Respect is the foundation for all relationships. Trust
cannot grow without respect. We need trust to be able to work together
to accomplish our goals in meeting patient needs.
Employ Empathy. Try to understand where the person is coming from. This
may be difficult especially during a conflict, but when you respect that
not everyone had the same upbringing or value infrastructure, you
realize that people behave badly often, not because they are bad people,
but because:
They have poor self-esteem and do not feel good about themselves. If
they did, they would never do anything to disrespect another human
being.
They don’t know how to behave differently. This is what they know.
They are scared. Their poor behavior is a front.
They have no idea how their behavior impacts others. Most people don’t.
By learning to CARE for yourself and others using Communication,
Appreciation, Respect and Empathy, the landscape changes. People start
behaving differently in a caring environment. When people feel safe,
they bring down their walls which hide the best of them; they are more
productive and cooperative. And through your example, they learn to CARE
too and like a virus, it spreads to create productive, enjoyable
relationships that nurture the best of people – including you.
Are You Afraid Of Accepting More Good?
by: Linda-Ann Stewart
Many years ago, I participated in an exercise at a workshop to show us
how at ease we were with allowing good into our lives. As I imagined a
little extra good flowing in, I was fine. But when I visualized a lot
more good, I started to get anxious, even scared.
The exercise continued, expanding the amount of good I would let in.
When I got past that first barrier, I was once again comfortable with
the concept of letting more good into my life. It was an interesting
exercise for me, showing, that for some reason, I was fearful of
allowing more Universal good flow into me.
Why would anyone be afraid of more good? Imagine heaven smiling down
upon you, living in grace, everything falling into place in your life.
Why would that create anxiety? Isn't that exactly what you want?
Since the time of the exercise, I've discovered that many people share
the fear I experienced. It comes in various shapes and forms, and from
multiple causes. And it's one reason you unconsciously block your
desires. Because of past experiences, you don't know what catastrophe
will happen if you actually achieve what you say you want in life.
Over the years, I've identified a few reasons for that concern:
Fear of a backlash. If you receive more good, you fear that somehow it
will be taken away. It's almost a superstition that one hand will give
the good, and another hand will take it away. Sometimes, this comes from
childhood. You might have received something you really wanted, but
then had a cherished toy taken from you because your parent decided that
you'd outgrown it.
Have to give it away. I've known several people who deliberately kept
their income at a low level so they wouldn't have to give their extra
money to indigent relatives. They couldn't say "No" to the relatives,
and save the extra for a rainy day in their own life. From a young age,
they were trained that they had to give all their extra toys and
cherished possessions to their siblings or cousins. They were the
"Cinderella" of the family, and haven't realized that things can be
different now.
Fear of punishment. Somehow, you fear that more good will bring some
punishment upon you. Some force will come down and make you pay for
having something great happen. You're receiving more good than you
deserve and should be flogged for it. The only thing that punishes you
is your old programming. You deserve all the good you receive.
This is one of the issues I discovered I had. I once had a childhood
friend who would put me down whenever I had something nice happen in my
life. She once told me that she wanted to make sure I didn't exaggerate
my importance. So I stopped telling her of any positives that occurred.
To begin to overcome this irrational fear that more good is scary,
examine what happened when you were a child. When you got some toy or
reward that others didn't get, how did you feel? What happened? Did you
get beat up, was it taken away, were you emotionally abandoned, resented
or attacked? Maybe you always had to share, and when you got the toy
back, it was damaged or destroyed.
Whatever happened to you, it set up a pattern in your subconscious to
expect this type of reaction every time you received something good in
your life. And it probably continues to this day. To begin to combat
that programming, remind yourself that you're the grownup now, and you
have the power to say "Yes" or "No" or "Take a hike." And that you have
the strength, ability, knowledge and resources to take care of your own
inner self and worth.
I still practice the workshop exercise occasionally. It gives me
feedback as to where I might be blocking myself, and to expand my
acceptance of more good. When I feel the fear, I talk to it, letting it
know that it doesn't have to protect me anymore. You can do the same
thing, and allow yourself to open your mind to receive more good every
day.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Network With Ease
by: Glenise Anderson
Networking is very important in our daily lives. Often the best jobs and
opportunities are not advertised but filled by word of mouth. With this
in mind, a good idea is to go and find them yourself. How is this done,
do I hear you ask? By the simple process of networking.
A number of people feel networking is waste of time and it has no effect
on personal relationships or being successful in your business. This
concept is completely incorrect. Relationships and business have been
built via the networking process for hundreds of years.
Networking is not about meeting hundreds of people, interacting with
them with them and then never meeting them again. It’s but about getting
to know each other and finding out if you are able to make the
relationship mutually beneficial for both of you. If you aren’t able to –
then see if you can introduce them to someone more compatible to their
business.
A simple example of how easy networking can be is the example of a woman
who used to love writing articles. One day she decided to donate one of
her articles to the local newspaper so it could be published and people
around the world could have the chance to read it. The article focused
on an event, which was coming up and was hosted by a woman’s publishing
group. The group not only liked the article, they appreciated what she
had done, so they recommended her to a national magazine. So now, not
only does she get to write regular articles, she also gets paid for it.
This example shows how networking can be done easily, if well thought
out. Touching base with a few people can in fact lead to reaching many.
By referring your friends or relatives whom you think are well suited
for a job is another way to network. I heard a story of someone
recommending a friend for a teaching position with a nonprofit
organization. Interestingly enough after getting the position, he
returned the favor by referring his friend into a job he had heard
about. Funny how things work out!
Family and friends are the easiest and best way to increase your network
among colleagues and friends. There are many industries that work on
filling positions this way and some even pay commission.
When looking for a new job, it may be worth joining a networking group
focusing on the sector of business you are interested in. It’s a great
way to meet people, do research into companies by asking questions of
those people who work there. Often the opportunity may just be within
that particular networking group.
The examples above show that in order to network effectively and in an
efficient manner, you do not need to be outgoing or know a lot of
people. All it requires is being creative, listen well, ask relevant
questions and develop a good reputation with others. You would be amazed
at how many doors will open for you.
Six Ways to Make Memorizing Poetry Easier
by: Kevin P. Green
The best way to experience poetry is to hear it out loud. While some
poems are made to be read, for many you cannot get their full effect
without hearing the spoken word. Epic poems were used since ancient
times to tell stories and teach lessons, a task which has been replaced
by books, movies, television, and the Internet. There is still a place
for poetry, however.
Whether it’s in competitions, or just to entertain, reciting poetry can
be a wonderful and fulfilling experience. Having children recite poetry
that they have memorized can be a fantastic exercise on many levels. It
can help with remembering details. It can be instructive in proper
preparation and organization. Finally, it can teach valuable performance
skills.
Memorizing poetry can be a challenge for some people, though. Here are some simple ways to make memorizing a poem a snap.
Start with a short poem. Don’t be tempted to bite off more than you can
chew. Committing a short poem to memory will give confidence that will
come through on stage and at the next study session.
Pick a poem that is interesting to you. It’s always much harder to study
something that you could care less about. The more that the words or
the poet mean to you, the more invested you will be in the process and
the easier the poem will be to memorize.
Read the poem over and over again. Try to grasp the meaning of the poem,
and don’t just try to remember the words without any context. It can
take dozens of times to reread the poem before you grasp its deeper
meaning. Write down how the poem makes you feel. In other words, try to
understand the poem, before you memorize it. It will make an enormous
difference both in studying, and in performing.
Take a break from time to time. Give yourself a chance to rest and your
brain the opportunity to absorb the material. Sometimes pushing harder
and longer will only result in frustration. Stop intermittently, walk
around, and give your conscious mind something else to occupy it for a
little while. Better yet, take a nap. Studies show that we tend to learn
better when the material is reviewed prior to sleep.
Make sure that you remain relaxed while you study. Don’t think about
deadlines, expectations, or performance anxiety. We know that stress has
a negative effect on the brain, and specifically on memory. Clear your
mind of extraneous thoughts. Sometimes yoga and meditation can help with
this. For other people, though, just listening to soothing music can do
the trick.
Try to make your study environment conducive to focus and productivity.
It’s no good to try to memorize a poem in a busy room with lots of
distraction. Do what you need to filter out the background noise and
remain set on your objective.
Take this advice to heart and you’ll be pleasantly surprised with the
results. Getting up in front of others to read poetry will be a fun
experience, and you’ll leave your audience awed and inspired.
Positive Networking
by: Glenise Anderson
Networking is skill which is extremely important in order to make
contact with different people. Not only is networking required within
the workplace, it is also required outside in various other situations.
For a woman to have positive networking skills is very important. Not
only is a woman usually in charge of the socializing of her family, she
is also sometimes responsible for gathering more clientele for the
business she works in. If she has her own business, networking becomes a
mandatory skill. For all these circumstances, positive networking
skills are extremely important.
Some people just meet others in order to add as many names in their
database and hence disregard quality and give more importance to
quantity instead. When networking is used incorrectly and for quantity
purposes only, it is known as networking abuse or when it comes to
emails may be regarded as ‘spam’. As a woman entrepreneur, you must
avoid this where possible – as your name is your business.
In order for networking to be positive, women must develop a well
thought out network game plan. Focus initially on getting to know the
people who you meet, make a decision about whether they are a match with
your business and if they aren’t move on. Always be polite, however,
don’t go to networking events expecting to hand out many cards – work on
quality and not quantity and your business will reflect this decision.
In order to develop positive networking skills, there are some tactics
which you can follow. Seven of these tips are mentioned below:
1. Always smile: A smile shows a person is warm and friendly. When meeting new people, smiling is welcoming and appropriate.
2. Look at people in their eye: When talking to someone, look them in
the eye while you speak. This is seen as a compliment and is the best
way to interact with someone new and whom you have just met.
3. Listen to the other person speaks: When having a conversation, it is
polite to listen to what the other person has to say. This shows
interest and if the person with whom you are conversing is likely to be
someone whom you can deal with in the future, active listening skills
will help immensely.
4. Have appropriate body language: Whatever impression new contacts will
have of you the first time you meet is bound to be the lasting
impression. In order for them to remember you in a positive way, have
good body language and be relaxed and friendly.
5. Do not be pushy: No one likes a person who behaves strongly or acts
in a needy manner. Hold your head up high and do not be afraid to show
people who you are and what you believe in. but remember not to go
arrogant.
6. Give a compliment: Everyone likes to receive a compliment. Ensure it
is heartfelt and truthful. Most people can judge if a compliment is
genuine or not, so be careful about what you say.
7. Have a business card ready: You never know when these may come in handy!
Bobproctorsuccess: Exercise Your Mind With The Success Series
by: Mandal Rathin
Most people would agree that the "essential" business success strategies
are a combination of goal setting, a positive attitude, proper
motivation, teamwork, high ideals, and hard, no, SMART work. In
evaluating success strategies it seems to me that I have missed probably
one of the more difficult ones: RISK. In business dealings, in
relationships, in just about every aspect of our lives that we deem
important, there's always an element of risk.The stakes may seem high if
we fail, BUT calculated risk multiplies geometrically the rewards when
we succeed. We all must stand for and believe in something. We must
believe in our higher Self. Trust in the good and the positive. Because
the odds are in their favor. Just as life is in your favor. Ask to win,
Plan to win, Trust to win! Where Are Those Goals? Are you doing
everything you set out to do earlier in the year? There's still plenty
of time to reach your goals. Goals? You did set goals, didn't you?
Without goals we have no way of measuring or gagging our productivity.
Look through the stack of paperwork on your desk and check your
briefcase, your goals must be there somewhere. What, you didn't write
them down? Without a clear, precise game plan, without a desired outcome
in writing, our destination is obscured. How can you hit a target if
you cannot see it? We need to review our goals everyday to stay focused.
The life stories of great men and women are testimonies to overcoming
great obstacles on the road to success.There may be "failures" on the
road to your own personal success. But with clearly defined written
goals you can overcome these obstacles and turn them into stepping
stones for success. Let's Do It Now!
“The Bob Proctor Library” bagged
* Money is not the goal:
The book deals with a primary premise that "Money is not the goal." It
is the result of many factors and the most important is our internal
belief, thinking, and attitude toward money, prosperity, and wealth.
* Be a Magnet to money :
This amazing 2 CD program by Bob Proctor with Michele Blood is a MUST
for anyone wishing to understand in detail the Law Of Attraction PLUS it
gives you the Tools to begin to attract Money and Success. Money is
Freedom-Freedom to live out your dreams, freedom to travel this
beautiful world. Be A Magnet to Money is one of the most simple and yet
greatest psychological discoveries of the 21st century.
* Become a Magnet to Money :
"Become a Magnet to Money" gives you all the steps you need to achieve
the success you desire. After much searching for the answers to attain
success, I am at peace knowing all the information and the practical
action steps I need to live the life of my dreams are in this book.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
"If I'm Perfect, No One Will Reject Me" - Healing Perfectionism
by: Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
Do you believe that being "perfect" gives you control over how people feel about you?"
If you do, then you are coming from 3 big false beliefs that are causing you much unhappiness.
FALSE BELIEF #1
"I can have control over how people feel about me."
Think for a moment whether or not others have control over how you feel
about them. Can someone do everything "right" and be "perfect" in their
own eyes, yet you don't enjoy being around them or you don't feel
connected with them?
Of course!
Others may influence how you feel about them, but they have no control
over how you feel about them. If you are a basically accepting person,
then you might like them even if they get angry or withdrawn. If you are
generally a judgmental person, then there may be little they can do for
you to like them.
Now turn this around regarding how others feel about you. Since you have
no control over whether or not another person is accepting or
judgmental, it stands to reason that you also have no control over how
they feel about you, regardless of how perfectly loving, open, caring,
giving, understanding, handsome, beautiful, or rich you are.
FALSE BELIEF #2
"There is a standard of perfectionism and I can reach it."
I grew up believing that there was a "right" and "perfect" way to be.
Then I learned that what I thought was right and perfect was not
necessarily what others thought was right and perfect. In fact, it
seemed that each person had a completely different understanding of what
it means to be perfect!
This was quite distressing to me, as it took away my illusion of control
over how people felt about me. At that time many years ago, I was
terrified of rejection, so it gave me great comfort to believe that if
only I was perfect enough, then I would never be rejected. Without a
standard of perfection, what would be my guiding light to feel safe?
FALSE BELIEF #3
"I am basically flawed and need to strive to cover up my flaws and appear to be better than I am."
As long as I believed that I was basically flawed in some way, I was
afraid of rejection. When I learned how to connect with my spiritual
Guidance and see myself through the eyes of truth rather than through
the eyes of my parents and others, I was able to see that my soul
essence - my core Self - is already perfect, a perfect individualized
expression of the Divine.
What was flawed were my beliefs that were programmed into me and needed to be healed.
HEALING PERFECTIONISM
Imagine how life would be for you if you knew that you were already
perfectly wonderful and incredible just the way you are in your true
Self? What if you could separate out the flawed, wounded, programmed
part of you - the part you created to help you survive pain - from the
magnificent part of you that God created. What if you could see that
your ego wounded self - with all your fears and protections and ways of
trying to have control over getting love and avoiding pain - is NOT who
you are.
Then, instead of perfectionism being your guiding light, being fully and passionately yourself becomes your guiding light!
I assure you, this is a MUCH easier way to live!
Managing Pressure for Work-Life Balance
by: Glenise Anderson
Women have to face all types of pressures in life. Whether these
pressures are related to the family life or work, they need to be dealt
with and managed in the appropriate way. There needs to be a balance
between these two aspects of life and here’s some tips on how every
woman can manage the stress of her life and keep the two aspects in a
balanced state.
1. If you don’t like what you are doing and are unable to find time for
your family with the current career, try looking for a role which is
more suitable to you and which allows you to take time out for your
family. Look for a career which is less stressful and less time
consuming. Searching for a new job may take some of your time but the
end results are bound to be fruitful.
2. If changing your career is too drastic a change, you may be able to
change the role you are in with another with your current employer. Look
for positions which do not have the same amount of stress as your
current job.
3. Even if you have a hectic schedule, it is important you take time out
to do the things you enjoy. Schedule time for yourself and with the
family. Spend some quality time with people whose company you enjoy.
4. If your workload at home is too great, share it with the other family
members. Trying to manage all the work at home while managing the
workload of the office as well is putting you in a very unhealthy
position. Sharing the responsibilities of the home will not only reduce
the workload you have, it will also encourage others to take
responsibility for their own lives.
5. Even with the rest of the family pitching in to the housework, if you
feel it is not enough then seek some outside help. You could find a
babysitter or nanny to take care of your children or you could ask
grandparents to look after them during the day while you are at work. It
is important that you take the time to find appropriate alternatives.
6. Don’t stress the small stuff. There’s too many other things to think
about to get caught up with the little things that happen that really
don’t matter. Don’t stress on the things which are not so important.
7. Learn to manage your time. Say no where appropriate and you can then
focus on the tasks which have higher priorities. Maintaining a balance
between your personal life and your work life will ensure your happiness
and success.
Seven Key Motives for Learning Spiritual Counseling
by: Jane Mountrose
Do you want to move in a new direction? Do you long to assist people in a
deeply meaningful way and do work that is truly special? You may be
drawn to spiritual counseling and questioning whether this is the life
work that you have been seeking.
Definition of Spiritual Counseling
Let’s take first things first. There are different ideas of the role of a
Spiritual Counselor. In this article, we are discussing a special form
of counseling that focuses on helping men and women to bring an
awareness of the spiritual realms into their every day reality. This
approach transcends the concepts of a single religion into the deeper
wisdom teachings that unite all of humanity’s major religious and
philosophical traditions.
There is a spiritual source that connects us all, which is the genuine
source of spiritual strength and awareness. Through the study of quantum
physics, science has now found this to be a fact. Spiritual Counseling
offers the possibility to assist people to connect with the vast realms
of spirit and make miracles happen in their daily lives.
Explore these purposes for becoming a Spiritual Counselor and ask yourself if any of these sound like you.
The Seven Motives
1. You enjoy life and love people. You experience the greatest joy when
you can be with people. You appreciate having opportunities to share
with them and uplift them.
2. You enjoy providing teaching. You always want to learn more and value
growth. You treasure sharing information and assisting others in
exploring transformational solutions to their challenges.
3. You seek deeper expression. You are self-inspired and long to do
something that is spiritually rewarding to you. You are determined to
transcend the ordinary and create an extraordinary life.
4. You feel a calling. You are excited and passionate about life. You
know that everything happens for a reason. You want to be fully alive,
and feel drawn to uplift people.
5. You are aware of the continuous presence of Spirit. You want to
assist men and women to awaken to their deeper awareness, and create a
strong connection with their higher awareness.
6. You can overcome limitations. You know you can help people to free
themselves of barriers that block their progress so they can experience
the joyful and fulfilling lives they deserve.
7. You understand infinite possibility. You want to help people to live
fully and expand their awareness of chances for growth that they never
imagined before.
If these thoughts excite you, the exciting news is that you are
embarking on an extraordinary journey. Involvement in this profound
spiritual work becomes more and more exciting as time passes. As your
awareness increases, your ability to assist the people you serve becomes
more and more profound.
Additional Insights about Spiritual Counseling
From a spiritual perspective, we are all here to evolve and live to the
fullest. We are only limited by the way we view ourselves and our
possibilities. We all have boundless opportunities that are ready to be
realized.
At the highest level, spiritual counseling assists people to release
perceived limitations and expand their awareness of their infinite
potential. Think what being a part of this spiritual expansion can mean
to you.
Porn Addiction Help
by: Junaid Ali
Unlike any other addiction pornography is a secret addiction. And if
your friends and family somehow come to know about this, it will be
equally disappointing for you as well as them. And it has a long lasting
negative effect on your attitude.
Anyone from a student to a white collar executive, they might be
bachelors or married, some want to check on their addiction and some
don’t want to get out of their addiction until its too late.
It needs professional help as well as strong will to stop porn
addiction. It may take several years, and you might have to spend
hundreds and thousands of dollars of fees and lots of prayer
Pornography addiction is in addict’s mind. Some people are consciously
aware about the addiction while others don’t. For addicts, pornography
is like a hobby to watch and read porn material. There might be many
triggers that kick start the desire to get involve in porn ranging from
lustful thoughts, feeling of loneliness, insecurity about sex, curiosity
about sex, and everyone have their own reasons.
To overcome your addiction of porn you should involve in other
activities that you love to do like music, dance, fitness, etc. Learn to
utilize your time when you are feeling down, get involve in housework,
or study, or exercise. You need to control your thoughts and divert them
when you feel like watching or reading porn.
There are few things that you can do to stop pornography addiction:
• Throw away all the pornography out of your home
• Be God fearing and Pray for help
• Reward yourself with a monthly incentive to stay away from porn
• Also punish yourself by donating a good amount of money each time you involve in porn.
• Become more self-disciplined.
Knowing Who You Are
by: Roseanna Leaton
We in general live a life of luxury. There is little real hardship in the way that we live in the Western world today. We have more money, more creature comforts and a greater ability to pursue myriad activities both near to home and far away. When you are being deprived of basic necessities in life your focus inevitably remains glued to the task of survival; one doesn't have time to luxuriate in ponderings about who you are or what your life's purpose is. Your purpose is simply focused upon staying alive.
And so the more comfort you have in your life the more time you inevitably have with which to focus your attention upon things of a more philosophical nature. Ironically the more we have the more dissatisfied we appear to become as we simply move our focus on to different things. When, I wonder, will we as a community finally appreciate what we have got and allow ourselves to enjoy a feeling of balance and satisfaction in our lives?
Julia Roberts, in this movie, sets out on a course to find herself which takes her to Rome, India and Bali over the course of a year. In Rome she learns to enjoy food for its taste and not worry about calories or weight gain. She also learns to make platonic friends and to live alone instead of constantly being in one relationship or another. She's not totally at one with this new experience, but she's apparently learning from it.
In India she learns to meditate and to further relax her thoughts, to a certain degree. She feels a little more centered but still knows that her journey is not complete. On she moves to Bali. Here she has to face a challenge; can she enter a close relationship without losing herself once more?
I'm sure that many people could empathize with several of the emotional tussles which were being expressed in this movie. Many people wonder who they are or what they should be doing. Many more wonder where their soul mate is and how they are ever going to find them. Some people shy away from relationships because they feel they will lose themselves if they were to commit; others throw themselves into one relationship after another and find themselves molding their habits and behaviors to whoever they are with.
All of these scenarios reflect a certain amount of emotional conflict, instability or insecurity. The quest to find oneself frequently takes people away from home, in search of peace and quiet and tranquility. The fact remains that you find this peace only when your mind becomes peaceful; this does not necessarily mean you have to go away so as to find peace.
Having said this, sometimes one finds it easier to totally change their environment so as to break old habits. The thing to remember though is that you generally have to go home at some point and still have to take the peace which you have found back home with you too. Otherwise you have not achieved any long term resolution to emotional turmoil or insecurities.
And when it comes to relationships, if you have really found your peace, and found yourself, you will not fear losing yourself. You will feel confident and secure in being one of two whole people who share a relationship as opposed to being one small fraction of a whole. Fears are only ever borne from your own chosen (although often unconsciously so) perception of a situation.
An alternative approach to finding yourself is to take time examining your thought processes and expectations in life and then focus upon ways in which you could think more powerfully and productively. To feel balanced and satisfied in life you have to learn to feel happy with yourself as you are, to stop comparing yourself to others and instead to feel confident being you.
Roseanna Leaton, specialist in hypnosis mp3 downloads to build confidence easily.
P.S. Discover how easy it is to focus your mind with hypnosis; grab yourself a free hypnosis mp3 from my website now.
Read More »»
Sunday, November 4, 2012
Invent And Innovate Yourself
by: Amy Twain
My friend is a speaker and she told me that so many years ago, when she
was speaking for a group, the director started to ask her how she came
about speaking on the topics or issues she did and how did she
particularly define that. My friend replied that she had not really
looked at something in particular.
My friend added that she was speaking and discussing in those topics
that really moved her, intellectually, spiritually and emotionally and
most especially on some topics of discussion which she believed will
greatly help people. Then the director suddenly brought up the thought.
“But why not invent or re-invent yourself, every so often?” my speaker
friend was about to make a note, that she was doing fine as it pertains
to monetary compensation and everything, but when the director in the
audience all of a sudden brought up that idea to invent and re-inventing
oneself, my friend also reflected.
The very word “invent” carries with it, the purpose or reason of a
designed and desired result. That is where one should start, and then
work backwards. My friend realized that though she had taken enough
planning and thought on which direction or way she wanted her life and
course to go, she actually never approached it from the angle of
inventing herself, nor with the plan or intention of inventing.
The power of this approach is that how you live your life and more
significantly, the kind of person you want or like to be is not left to
fate, destiny, whims, current happenings or even circumstances. There
are several people that do not live with end-purpose-intent/motive. They
simply let their life, just freely move around or bounce from random
choosing, however the boss might react, whatever will take place, to
whatever feels good at that moment.
Okay, say for example you take an individual’s manner of dressing.
Several on one side of society just take sit as it sees, accepts what’s
given or simply remains and stays loyal to the way they dressed when
they were in high school or college. While the other side especially the
current pop culture and fashion, just lets whoever is the big name on
Fashion Network determine the style and length of their pants, how they
look or what type of design, color, cut etc.
So rather than letting all those other outside influences dictate your
choices and designs, why not just “invent” the person you want to be in
your clothes? It is incredible how much power, control and direction it
can give you. Then try working in that desired direction. Think and
decide if the clothing is appropriate for your work, your values, your
family and friends.
Or much more importantly, the family you want to have in the future and
the values you want to have. The person you want to be and the job you
want to do. Always “invent” with the style and design of who you want to
be and the life you always dream to have.
Innovate A Current Niche To Improve Your Business
by: Amy Twain
If I am about to make an educated guess, I think I will find many
professionals around the world who considered themselves “should have”
experts or gurus. As in, “I should have done that.” As my friend Calyx, a
Global Client Communicator Mentor told me, that he always hears this
message form clients almost all the time.
Self employed professionals think and feel that they have to copy or
imitate what their competitors are doing; they think that they have to
be doing the similar thing. Well, after all, they need to keep up with
the competition/race, right? Hmmm…not exactly. The standard answer to
that is: Correct, the capacity to model your business after another
business that already has a niche (a situation or activity specially
suited for a person’s abilities or character) is your quickest pathway
to income or success.
However, those clients of yours will still buy your services and
patronize your products because of YOU! Your clients still need to know
how your distinct skills and abilities will help in solving their
problem. And take note—individuals who are specialized and highly unique
are sought-after more often and get paid the most.
My friend Calyx never really tried to convince his clients to be all
things all at once to most people—not at all. And your clients are not
looking for a generalist. Come to think of it, it takes so much money
and time to convey that marketing message across. Your clients are
actually looking for an expert or simply a mentor who could give them
desired results that they’re looking for or who could solve their
problem fast.
Now let’s try to be more specific about an easy way to innovate a
present niche. You can begin by making a list of some questions to ask
(or remind) yourself everyday. You can write the answers to these
questions in your diary, personal notes or journal or you can even think
about them in your mind.
Anyway, the questions can be: 1.) What is it about my business I can
innovate that could provide locally, which can also be easily done
globally? 2.) What is my business doing right now, that my clients could
be looking forward or benefit from over the next 3-5 years? 3.) In this
line of work, what is it about that can be made more effective or can
be improved? 4.) What is it about my competitors that I can be doing
more profitably or more successfully? Jay Abraham once declared that,
“all ideas or concepts are a new combination of old ideas, and that the
only way to get ideas is to study and learn the basis and principles
behind current happenings.” Now in this kind of economy we have, try not
to spin your wheels making or creating a niche.
You would analyze, analyze and still do a lot of analysis while your
prospects got their needs already met by your competitors. Instead, try
working with a mentor who could assist you innovate a present niche and
establish the true results you give and provide your local and global
clientele as well.
Got Time To Read More Books?
by: Amy Twain
Have you still got the time to read more books? Do they only gather a
lot of dusts and cobwebs because you don't care to open them or you
simply lack the time to read more books?
You have to accept the fact that you can pick the ones you like to keep
on reading--and that you don't have to peruse everything. There may be
plenty of classics and others which claims that some works are
"must-read", but then again, you don't have to force yourself in try and
reading more books if you can't even get past the tenth or at least the
5th page.
What matters most is that you choose to read more books you only want to
read and not just you buy a book that everyone is talking about but
then you can't even manage to get on with it!
Here are some tips in what to look for to really know what you want to get on reading:
1) Look for genres which truly interests you. There are several of
them--romance, suspense, thrillers, psychological thrillers, horror,
sci-fi, fantasy, etc.
2) Search for those written by authors you already know and enjoyed their works.
3) And those whom people highly recommend you try and at the same time,
who like the similar books you enjoy. Of course, you have to understand
that not all reading materials grab your attention right from the first
page. Give yourself and the book enough time to sink in and be immersed
in a subject matter or characters of the book. Don't rush and be in a
hurry to grab a book if you got only a few minutes left to spare, or you
have some important agenda to work on first.
Just the same with people, it takes awhile to get to know someone, like
you give yourself ample time to get started with a book. But hey, once
you're engrossed or get attached, you'll find it easy to continue
reading.
Why It Is Better To Simplify
by: Amy Twain
Even in those times of frantic pacing and harried lifestyles, you know
that you always have the choice to simplify and do less. It is the
solution to almost every aspect of our lives.
To simplify is the answer to your financial difficulties: Shop less and
spend less. Don't try to spend more than what you actually earn. Cut
back on your bills and decrease your debt. Rather than trying to handle
all your bills and expenses, try to simplify. If necessary, have fewer
credit cards, of get rid of your credit card if you have to. Eliminate
your financial problems so that you
will have lesser stress.
Got some time management problems? Try to do less and manage less on
your agenda and you would get rid of the difficulty of trying to handle
it all. Instead of figuring out how to deal with your packed schedule,
strive to simplify. Decrease your commitments if you can't handle it.
Decline some projects, meetings and some favors which will only eat most
of your precious time.
If you want to end your storage problems, begin to simplify be
minimizing clutter. When you have lesser things on your possessions, it
means you need lesser storage. When this happens, life becomes less
stressful. In the process, you will save a lot of money when it comes to
maintenance and storage.
Indeed, it's not that easy to simplify especially if you're one of those
who hoard most of your stuff but in the long run, will simply
accumulate space which you need to store other important things.
Simplicity requires the courage to say no to commitments, to let go of
your unnecessary stuff, and to be different than the way we always used
to do things.
Consequently, you'll realize that it's all worth it--less hassles and stress and more efficiency.
Friday, November 2, 2012
The Eyes Have It
by: Wee Dilts
What is eye contact?
Several popular definitions are:
1. Eye contact is one of the most important nonverbal channels you have for communicating and connecting with others.
2. Defined as a meeting of the eyes between two people expresses meaningful nonverbal communication.
3. Contact that occurs when two people look directly at each other or when two people or animals look into each others eye at the same time.
4. It is the condition or action of looking another human or animal in the eye.
Linda Eve Diamond:
“The cheapest, most effective way to connect with people is to look them in the eye.”
What does eye contact do?
Eye contact can trigger:
Fighting
Smiling
Acknowledgment
Invitation
Understanding
Encouragement
Eye contact is two souls touching. Imagine, all the power your eyes hold.
Of all the ways we communicate, eye contact maybe the most powerful. The first step in establishing communication is eye contact.
Communication with pets and animals is with eye contact, and depending on the animal you maintain or avoid contact.
Did you ever look at a horse and know that your souls had communicated?
Have you ever looked at your dog and known that the two of you connected at a spiritual level?
My best friend and I can communicate volumes with just a glance.
So are the eyes a window to the soul? I’d say so.
What is the power of eye contact?
Ralph Waldo Emerson:
“An eye can threaten like a loaded gun, or it can insult like hissing or kicking or in its altered mood, be a beam of kindness. It can make the heart dance for joy.”
Words will probably never be found to communicate what actually transpires when you are communicating with another living creature through eye contact. Maybe it should it be “I” contact?
Besides touch, eye contact is the most powerful way of delivering personal cues.
Eye contact shows personal involvement and creates intimate bonds. Mutual gazing narrows physical gaps. It brings people closer.
The eyes play an indispensable role in effective communication and the building relationships.
The look of love; remember that look and the physical wham when wordlessly you knew you were attracted.
What can you say with the eyes?
Eye contact says to the other person:
I am interested in you
I respect you
I trust you
You have my attention
I value you
Then there is the avoidance of eye contact like the elevator stare. Fear of making eye contact with strangers and wild animals. Eye contact can be perceived as a challenge a precursor to aggression.
We probe each others eyes for mood signs like:
Trust can be developed almost immediately through eye contact.
Flirting a coy glance can be the beginning of all sorts of things
Bonding eye contact immediately brings two people closer
Feedback on how others are receiving you.
Winking says you and I know.
Our eyes are wonderful gifts. They help us express our feelings of:
Love
Acceptance
Hope
Warning
Fear
Anger
And much more, without a word.
Not maintaining eye contact in this country carries the connotation that the person is not trustworthy.
In other countries maintaining eye contact may be considered rude and disrespectful.
What does eye movement mean?
Eye contact gives you valuable clues as to what a person is thinking.
Kinesthetic people tend to look down
Visual people tend to look up
Auditory people tend to look sideways
People who look left to gather thoughts tend to be religious, artistic. They are most likely remembering.
People who look to the right tend to be scientific
People who look up and right may be constructing or making up an answer.
Eye contact can mean permission to speak or it can be a command; like when you say to someone “look at me when I’m talking to you.”
We’re demanding their attention; also, that they join us at a deeper level.
People who are autistic or have social anxiety problems experience trouble maintaining eye contact as do liars.
When might you want to make eye contact?
When you want to say hello without a word.
To exchange a warm greeting
In the store to brighten someone’s day
At dinner
In an interview
At a party
Playing a team sport
When might you want to avoid eye contact?
Walking down a dark alley
Face to face with a bear or other predatory animal
While driving
Ralph Waldo Emerson:
“On of the most wonderful things in nature is the glace of the eye; it transcends speech; it is the bodily symbol of identity.”
You can learn to maintain good eye contact. Practice doing it.
Make eye contact and smile at a stranger, can’t hurt.
Maintaining eye contact helps keep you focused on what the other person is saying; rather than thinking ahead to what you want to say.
In Western culture a shifty eyed person is judged badly; they are suspicious, up to no good.
Mahatma Gandhi:
“An eye for an eye and soon the whole world is blind.”
SUMMARY
Benjamin Franklin:
“Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterwards.”
In our society there is an increased need for interaction. Think of the joy you can spread by making eye contact and a smiling at the checker in the store, the wait person, or a passer by on the street.
It sends positive vibes. It is a sign of a confident person
Build self confidence . . . Practice eye contact
Copyright © Wee Dilts 2009 Read More »»
Stress Relief Activities Can Improve Your Life
by: Edyta Kowalska
There are many of different stress relief activities that you can use
like yoga, art and seeing nature, but these are only a few of the many
available. You can get relief from stress by doing something that you
enjoy whether it’s doing a spot of gardening or going for a run.
People think that the easy way out of stress is getting medication but
why do that when you can try to solve your problem yourself? Simply try
to take time out from your busy life and have some of that ‘you’ time
where you can think about which direction your life Is going and, if you
like it or not, you could always try a career change or make fresh
start in life.
Also for stress relief activities it has been proven that lying on the
sofa with your eyes shut not thinking of anything else but you, in a
quiet relaxing place, can decrease your stress levels. For example
imagine you having a picnic in the forest, in front of a cool lake, and
you can smell the wild flowers and you can hear nothing but the birds
singing! Then open your eyes and you should feel calm and relaxed.
Pop to your local gym and enquire about their yoga and meditation
classes, try to go to one or both of these to channel your body in
becoming relaxed. Soon you should feel stress free and happier with your
life. The main thing when you are trying to de-stress yourself is to
remember that healthy eating helps; keep away from sugary foods as these
can leave you feeling agitated and lower your mood. Drink more water
and eat more fruit and vegetables throughout the day as this will boost
your confidence. You will soon learn which stress relief activities help
you, and then you can make a daily routine to stick by.
To help with stress relief remember to get plenty of sleep; it is
recommended that you to get eight to nine hours sleep to recharge your
batteries for the following day to prepare you for anything that may be
coming. If you find yourself in a stressful situation try taking five
deep breaths right from the bottom of your stomach and breathe in
through the nose and out through your mouth. This will decrease the
stress building up.
Try to take all these tips onboard and before you know it you will be
left feeling de-stressed, full of energy and you will be able to face
anything that life throws at you. Any of these tips on stress relief
activities will surely hel
You Lead,I Follow - The Non-Leader
by: Personal Musings
But what of the people who consider themselves non-leaders?
If you are contented to follow, you are, by definition, a follower. Yet, the reality is that no one is a 100% follower. Everyone, bar none, will at one time or another be in a leadership position.
“Anyone knows a good restaurant around here?”
A timid hands goes up, and Timid Tim says, “I do. Follow me.”
No! That is not leadership! Yes, I can hear those protests loud and clear. Now, Timid Tim starts walking, turns a corner, goes down a flight of stairs, turns another corner all the while muttering to himself about how wonderful that restaurant is. Then, when he arrives, he is alone. Somewhere along the way, he manages to lose the entire group.
Sure, that is not LEADERSHIP, but even this simple example of leading a small group serves to show that at some point, you have to lead.
When speakers talk about leadership and how everyone should be trained and about how everyone is a leader, there are many scoffers. They think that this is all about selling more seminars. Or it is just hot air to encourage the “others” so they don’t feel too bad. Hardly.
In our many capacities, we are followers in some and leaders in others. It is inevitable. Have you ever followed someone with an IQ less than yours simply because he knew where the toilet was and you don’t?
Leadership skills are especially important at home. At work, there is always some one ready to step up to the plate. We all want to excel. Be promoted. Be noticed. One man’s faltering is another man’s elevator.
But at home, there is just you and your family. Think about that. The option for someone else to “step up to the plate” are not too plentiful in the home.
So, the next time you have a chance to attend a “leadership workshop” or a leadership seminar, don’t pass up the chance just because you think you are not a leader. Read More »»
Can You Get Codependency Treatment?
by: Kathryn J Lambert
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When it comes to codependency treatment, there is no one-size-fits-all method. There's not magic pull that will aid you get over being codependent. There is no way around it, it will take hard work in order to overcome being a codependent. Codpendency treatment can be difficult and painful at times. There's no quick fix! The good news is that the steps that you have to take are simple.
Once you are able to decide that you are codependent, you are probably questioning what codependency treatment options may be available. Codependency is a behavior that is learned and not one that is genetic or the result of a chemical imbalance. The best news is that you can learn new behaviors that will allow you to have healthier relationships in the future.
For many people, support groups are one of the best codependency treatment options available today. Groups like Codependents Anonymous are free and they offer support as well as a 12-step program. The main benefit to a support group is that you will be able to interact with other people who are in the same situation with you.
Choosing and reading quality books about getting past codependency is another great treatment option for many people. The leading codependency treatment book is most likely Codependent No More. You have to be willing to take the advice that you are offered in a book for it to work. If you do, you can really improve the way you relate to others.
Starting a journal is very helpful to many people as they work their way through recovering from their codependency. Starting a journal isn't the only thing you should do. You also need the assistance of a professional - in the form of a support group, counselor, or reading material. But writing your thoughts on paper is a great step as well.
If you can afford it, professional counseling is probably the best option for codependency treatment. A lot of people avoid counseling because they think that to go means they are somehow bad or broken, but that isn't the case at all. The truth is that counseling offers healing for many people. Talking to someone you can be open with and who can offer you practical advice on recovery can be the best thing you ever do.
Unfortunately, there's no easy way to overcome codependency. However, there are lots of options when it comes to codependency treatment and if you are serious about changing your habits when it comes to relationships, you'll find the help you need to do it!
What's next? Visit http://codependentrelationships.org/options-for-codependency-treatment/ for more information on getting help with your codependency.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
6 Simple Self Improvement Tips
by: Daniel Better
After years of study in the self improvement arena, I have found the following strategies to be invaluable. Any chance I can give back to others that have that same thirst to better themselves, I consider it a privilege knowing that I was once in the exact same place.
Expect to Achieve
While many think that the majority of people who are successful in the world are smarter than they are, that simply is not the case. The real secret here is to expect to win before it has ever happened. I can’t stress enough how important this is. Your mindset has a hugely powerful effect on whether or not you will attain your dreams and goals.
Note that I didn’t say you need knowledge to win, because the fact of the matter is having a bold and determined expectancy goes a lot further than actually having the knowledge. The knowledge will come with conviction and persistence.
Keep a Daily Journal
You will be hardpressed to find an ultra successful person who doesn’t adopt a personal daily journal. We can’t keep track of everything that passes through our minds and this is when a journal comes in extremely handy. Whenever something strikes you as something you would like to do, accomplish or feel passionate about, get in the habit of writing it down. It will give you a sense of self-awareness and will skyrocket your confidence in yourself.
Meditation
Known to be a fabulous stress reliever not to mention the other health benefits like aiding in digestion and even slowing your heart rate, this is one of the most overlooked of the techniques even though it could very well be one of the most important. It drastically helps in avoiding worries and anxiety because it clears your mind of all the negative thoughts useless thoughts that we all feel from time to time. Your sleep will be more restful and it will help you make the most of the other techniques shared here.
Write Action Plans & Specific Goals
The simple act of putting pen to paper has a dramatic effect on clarifying your goals and aids with the expectancy I talked about earlier. This habit of writing down goals is mandatory if you want to actually achieve those goals. Dreaming is one thing, doing is quite another. All of these written goals should lead you to your ultimate long term goal and perfect life.
Daily Affirmations
Getting in the habit of reading aloud positive affirmations each and every day will lierally change your character, your personality and ultimately change the actions you take every day of your life. I have found that reading these out loud when I get up in the morning and before I go to bed at night to work very well. You can’t help but change your inner self by doing this religiously every day.
Be Well Rounded
All areas of your life are affected by all other areas of your life. By that I mean, if you have bad relationships for example, your finances and even your health will suffer also. Problems in your relationships, your health or finances will zap the necessary energy to make the most out of all of these areas of your life. Personal development and success will become much more difficult as a result.
In order to accomplish great things, living a balanced life is so important, a life of great emotional fortitude, financial security and physical stamina. Be well rounded in all of these areas and you will inevitably reap the rewards.
To great success in your life! Read More »»
Inspirational Proverbs Of Solomon That Enrich People's Lives
by: Michael Lee
Reading inspirational proverbs of Solomon has always aided me in
difficult times. Whenever I find myself in sticky situations, or
whenever I'm caught between two confusing paths, his wise words often
have the power to clear my head.
Why don't you read and benefit from Solomon's words of wisdom yourself?
Inspirational Proverb of Solomon # 1: “Do you see a man wise in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than him.”
This particular proverb always reminds me not to get caught up in my own
hype. No matter how much I have accomplished, I dare not think of
myself as the greatest or the wisest of all.
Sure, I like to reward myself for a job well done; but the truth is,
there will always be someone far greater and wiser than myself. And the
moment I start thinking that I am the best is the moment I stop growing.
Don't fall into this trap and keep finding ways to better yourself.
Inspirational Proverb of Solomon # 2: “An iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.”
This is one of my favorite quotes because it is phrased so wittily. The
way King Solomon uses the word “sharpens” can mean a lot of different
things.
There are times when “sharpens” talks about having a friend who keeps
you in line. Let's be honest. Sometimes, we lose sight of who we are on
the journey to success.
On the other hand, “sharpens” can also mean having a friend to help you
become a better person. Your friends at work, for example, can help you
develop your skills in pitching and presenting ideas.
Inspirational Proverb of Solomon # 3: “Your own soul is nourished when you are kind; it is destroyed when you are cruel.”
Some people make fun of those who are kind and nice. Those in the
corporate world are particularly vicious when it comes to getting the
corner office or that impending promotion.
However, this enlightening proverb reminds everyone that while lying,
cheating and basically doing cruel things can get you short-term
success, your acts will destroy you in the long run.
Before you go down that path, think again. At the end of the day, can you really stomach what you're about to do?
These inspirational proverbs of Solomon are as good as gold when it
comes to making your life richer. Don't just limit yourself to reading
them once; read them again and again so that you'll always remember.
Duality Vs. Polarity
by: James Renford Powell
The one concept that above all others plagues human beings, and has done
so for all of recorded history, is the concept of duality. It is a
hidden enemy, created in wrong thought (relative consciousness), and fed
by fear. It has divided the world of man and has been the instrument of
more death and destruction than all the terms we commonly use to
describe evil. And yet the people of the world, as a whole, continue
trapped in the same belief pattern. What is this thing called “duality”?
Virtually every Church and most of the religions of the world have
propagated this idea in their doctrine. Why is it such a pervasive idea,
and why has it attracted such a following?
Many of the precepts of Hermes Trismegistus, an ancient Master in Egypt,
can be found within virtually every world religion. It is possible that
misunderstanding of this ancient teaching, interwoven with doctrine,
may have led to the belief in dualism. Even initiates of Hermetic
teachings today write in such a way that can cause confusion. The
Hermetic principle of Polarity is presented as, “all manifested things
have two sides, two aspects, two poles, a pair of opposites with
manifold degrees between the two extremes.” This is a description of
Polarity and not duality, but it is obvious how dualism can spring from
an incomplete understanding. It is from the doctrine of Zoroastrianism
that the universal struggle is described as the forces of evil against
the forces of good is derived.
A clear understanding of three Hermetic Precepts might give you some
clues as to how the fallacy of duality has been derived. 1)
Correspondence – “As above, so below; as below, so above.” To some
people this meant two worlds, as opposed to many planes of the absolute
unity of Universal Being. 2) Polarity – “Everything is dual; everything
has poles; everything has its pair of opposites; like and unlike are the
same; opposites are identical in nature, but different in degree;
extremes meet; all truths are but half truths; all paradoxes may be
reconciled. The fact that all paradoxes may be reconciled clearly
indicates that all paradoxes are a part of the whole. 3) Gender –
“Gender is in everything; everything has its masculine and feminine
principles; Gender manifests on all planes.” So, we have multiple planes
and the masculine and feminine principles are manifested in each and
all are part of the whole.
The definition of Polarity which says, “Everything is dual” is taken to
mean the world is dualistic. A closer look at each of these precepts and
it is clear that while these poles and opposites are present they are
present within the whole. Man sees forces on the other side where we go
when we die. He wants to believe there are other planes but the
experience of life and death chill him. He has a hard time reconciling
life and death as just phases of the whole. For those who accept
duality, the world is full of calamities that are thrown at them by evil
forces, and how well they handle them determines whether they go to
heaven or hell.
We hear people talk about how a city is racially polarized as if this in
itself was proof of duality. In fact, the word “polarity” is proof of
exactly the opposite of duality. Duality is a concept that states that
there are two forces, good and evil, warring against each other. It is a
lie the intellect has created, and we have accepted. There is only one
power, and the other is created in our ignorance by the intellect and
fed by our fear. When you say that a city is racially polarized, you are
actually confirming the unity of humanity. There may be significant
differences, culturally and economically, but polarity simply means the
extreme points of one thing. If you have racial polarity all that is
proved is that we are all human. The Universal Law is Absolute Unity.
The perception is duality.
Most theology is dualistic in nature. Only a few Christian churches
emphasize that there really is no competing power with God. The Unity
Movement has made its statement of belief in the “Absolute Unity of all”
the linchpin of its positive affirmations. Their affirmation is “There
is only one power and presence in the universe, God the good omnipotent,
the everywhere present Principle of Absolute Good.” In virtually every
other theology, the universe is a battleground between good and evil. On
the one side we have the Almighty God who created the heavens and the
earth, and on the other side we have Satan, a fallen angel who reaches
for and has an equal power status on earth. In fact, he is depicted as
having control of earth. The world turns, and the battle rages for the
souls of men. Everything is defined in terms of good and evil.
To say that there is only one power and presence in the universe is not
just a statement of adoration and praise to God. It is a statement of
principle. It is a statement of the Universal Law of Absolute Unity.
When we say this, we are confirming that there is no other power but
God. We are in essence renouncing duality and the idea of a second power
that can compete and war against God. We are recognizing and affirming
that evil and satanic forces are a creation of the intellect and a
perversion of the reality of Absolute Unity. One cannot deny that
negative and fearful thinking is the cause of negative and fearful
consequences. Why? Because all thought creates. Thought will create
constructively or destructively, but it always creates. Our world, our
lives are our creations. What people refer to as evil might more
accurately be seen as the destructive results of fearful, negative and
wrong thought. It comes from man’s intellect and creates the perceived
barriers to God. It instills in man the belief that there is a
separation from God, which has never existed. It cannot and could not be
because God is in man and everywhere present. Absolute means ABSOLUTE.
If God is omnipresent, he is everywhere. So what could be considered
evil? It can only be our perception of separation from God. It has no
reality in truth.
Even some of the more enlightened religious systems retain a lingering
vestige of the thought that man has somehow been separated from God and
must go through a process of purification or karmic learning in order to
be reunited with God. The Catholic Church has its purgatory in which
the last bits of sin and perdition are removed before man can return to
God. Some metaphysical schools, while teaching the Universal Laws, have
not been able to get past duality. At least one of these schools
actually teaches that there is the Universal Law of Duality. We have
those who talk about good karma and bad karma. They say that this bad
karma has to be paid in order to go back to God. There is no such thing
as good karma or bad karma. There is only karma or balance. One might
call it bad karma because an experience is unpleasant. However, all
experience is attracted because we need the learning experience. In our
pain, we don’t recognize or appreciate the experience, but it is part of
the Law of Balance and Equalization.
How do we know that duality is a false perception, and what do we do
about it? We can know through the process of identifying and verifying
the Universal Laws in our lives. We can know the fallacy because we can
understand the Universal Law of Absolute Unity. We understand that to
look for solutions, or to place blame outside of ourselves, is a useless
exercise. We know there is only one power in the Universe, and it is
everywhere present. What we have perceived as a separation from God is
only a creation of the intellect. Even with all the evidence of order in
nature, we have been able to see only chaos and destruction in the
storm. We forget that it is a product of natural order. In our concept
of spiritual things we have perceived God as out there somewhere and
heaven as up there! What we have perceived as an evil force is a product
of fear created and fed by the imagination of the intellect. The
intellect/ego, left to its own devices, seeks to establish itself as
separate from the whole. It will go to extraordinary extremes to protect
itself and establish its own power.
The ego does not need the protection it seeks in separation. It doesn’t
need the creation of a great world struggle between good and evil to
give it meaning. It does not have to feel smarter, superior or to have
been chosen as God’s elite to give it self-worth. It must recognize that
it is its own worst enemy because it seeks to block itself from the
all-powerful whole of which it is an indivisible part. As Emily Cady
writes, “All joy and strength and good spring up from a fountain within
one’s own being, and if we only knew this truth, we should know that,
because God in us is the fountain out of which springs all our good,
nothing that anyone does or says or fails to do or say, can take away
our joy and good.” We must deny fear any of the power that springs from
our imagination because the imagination will create constructively or
destructively. It will create one way as easily as the other. We must
deny the intellect the right to create the barrier. We must recognize
polarity is found everywhere and in everything, but understand polarity
to be parts of the whole. We must become fully aware that polarity and
duality are not the same. The first is a fact of existence and the
latter a mutant perversion that exists only as a perception of the
intellect.
The Kabbalists (Mystic Judaism) say that the spiritual and physical came
from the same substance and affirm that the apparent duality is really
only a mistaken view of the universe, that in reality there is absolute
unity. “A barrier need not be physical, like a gate or fence”, to be
effective, declares David Sheinkin, author of Path of the Kabbalah. Men
and women die every day because of the barriers erected from their
beliefs. The commonly held worldview I refer to as duality contributes
most to the barriers. The concepts of good versus evil and God versus
Satan could be overcome with awareness of only one power existing in the
universe and the concept of separateness from God as a perversion. Even
what we call the spiritual dimension and the material dimension cannot
truly be understood as duality because they exist in the same place at
the same time. They are a part of the whole.
Duality is a perception of man, created by man and is derived from man’s
own mistaken concept of his Being. The concept itself remains his
greatest enemy because this ignorance of his real nature keeps him
thinking that he has been separated from God. The good news from Jesus
and other great masters was that God dwells in man. God is at hand
within, and all power is available to each of us with the awareness of
this presence. God has never left us, and we have never separated
ourselves from God because it is not possible. What we have done through
the intellect is put on blinders. We have always been with God and will
always be with God. We experience in the body for purposes that only
the IAM Consciousness knows. It is this consciousness that directs us,
and not the relative conscious we know as our ego or intellect. Only
human intellect/ego, with its free will, can even conceive the concept
of separation from God. Man is the only entity that can come up with
this idea! This separation from the Light of God is only in the
imagination of the heart where the negative intellect, combined with
emotion, strives in a darkness of its own making.
Friday, October 26, 2012
Dual Diagnosis Drug Rehabs Give People Hope
by: Walker Wild
Dual Diagnosis Drug Rehab centers are full service drug rehab facilities
designed to diagnose and treat the dual causes of drug addiction,
including underlying mental illness. Drug addiction is often intertwined
with a deeper emotional problem and Dual Diagnosis Drug Rehabs can
help.
The harsh reality of drug addiction combined with mental illness is that
recovery becomes more challenging. Both issues must be addressed with
equal parts of passion and aggression. With Dual Diagnosis, patients are
offered the best possible chance of recovery because they are treated
for both their addiction and any causal psychological disorders
simultaneously. This revolutionary approach to addiction offers hope
where none has been found in the past.
Sadly, people suffering from addiction face a high instance of relapse.
Months of sobriety can be shattered in one day simply because of a
hidden, causal mental illness. Drug addiction is often associated with
the need to self-medicate for depression, anxiety, and a host of other
mental concerns. When an individual is faced with the anguish of a
psychological infirmity, it becomes very easy and very tempting to give
into the intense desire to engage in drug use in an effort to numb the
pain.
Proper drug rehabilitation and psychological treatment can offer a plan
of attack for the addict, and a strong shoulder to lean on in moments of
weakness. It's often difficult for friends and family members to
understand the power of addiction. Dual Diagnosis Drug Rehabs can help
families build a secure support system that empowers the addict to make
healthy choices both in terms of drug addiction and mental suffering.
A common issue drug addicts face is denial. It typically takes a
breakthrough of self-revelation for an addict to admit that he or she
has a problem. Unfortunately, a mental disorder like depression, bipolar
disorder, etc. can make it more difficult for a person to achieve that
ever important breakthrough. If an addict can't visualize their
problems, recovery is not likely.
If you or someone you love is facing a drug addiction, consider Dual
Diagnosis Drug Rehabs for treatment. Patients will not only get
depression treatment, but they will also learn cognitive reasoning
skills or attend a twelve step program of recovery and also learn to
face their issues head-on. Dual Diagnosis Centers offer psychological
treatment and drug rehabilitation under one roof, thereby tackling the
issue of addiction at its core. With dual diagnosis, patients are
offered the opportunity to break the chains of addiction once and for
all.
Simple Ways To Improve Memory
by: Alexanes Leeny
Are you seeking ways to Improve Memory? The human mind is undoubtedly a
wonderful tool but memory is a skill that can only be cultivated with
some practice and a lot of patience. Anyone wanting to improve memory
can learn memory sharpening skills and problem solving techniques with
only a little effort.
No one actually has "bad" memory. The problem is that people unknowingly
end up developing bad memory habits as early as infancy itself. Because
of bad recall habits, people often face problems during examinations,
interviews and other circumstances that require efficient memory.
Many people believe that they possess a poor capacity to remember facts,
information and experiences in life. However, many ways and techniques,
which can be applied at any age, aid in memory improvement. In fact,
improving memory is just a method of modulating certain personal habits
in order to practice skills that can help in strengthening recall power.
If you are also looking for ways you can improve your memory then the
best way to start is by visiting the improvememoryhub.com. By visiting
this website, you will be able to draw the maximum advantage of the free
memory improvements articles, videos and resources. The website
features interactive and skilled audio techniques that can help those
suffering with problems of memory loss.
Who would not like to sharpen his/her cognitive function and improve
their ability to retain information? Memory improvement techniques are
endless and it is very important to effectively navigate through these
techniques so that life becomes even easier thereby increasing
brainpower.
All of us know that neither memory loss nor the ability to improve
memory is dependent on age. Regardless of your age, you can successfully
improve your memory. Below are a few ways that can help you to improve
your memory.
Proper Diet and Sleep
It is very important to have a highly nutritious diet that is rich in
minerals and vitamins. Following a proper diet and adequate sleep is
also extremely important. Both these things help to optimize learning
abilities and keep the body healthy. Diets rich in fruits and vegetables
have been proven to improve brain activity.
Stay Organized
Staying organized helps in reducing stress and simplifying life. Staying
clutter free will help you get rid of trivial matters. You will be able
to channel your mental energy and focus on things that are more
important. Staying organized will also increase your ability to retain
more information.
Exercise Your Brain
In order to function at a high level, our brain needs adequate exercise.
It is extremely important to keep the brain active and give it enough
opportunities to grow. You can involve yourself in crossword puzzles,
Sudoku and in playing strategy games such as chess or checkers.
Use Brain Foods
According to studies, certain food items help in improving memory. Some
of these items are grapes, apples, blueberries, onions, whole-grain
puffed rice, spinach, curry, orange juice, nuts, dark leafy vegetables,
fish and caffeine.